I drove around the inlet today. The road is winding and narrow and it’s often hard to see what is coming in the other direction, so I’m always on the alert. Even so, I was quite surprised to be confronted by a pilot vehicle coming rapidly towards me carrying a sign announcing there was a WIDE LOAD FOLLOWING.

My immediate thought was – ‘great, how am I supposed to go to get out of the way?’ On one side there is a drop to water and on the other there is mostly sheer cliff face. And as I said, the road is narrow with quite a few twists and turns. All I could do was take a deep breath and slow right down, concentrating on the basics of keeping safe, keeping as far to the left as possible, and hopefully not colliding with the oncoming vehicle.

It made me think that life can be a bit like this too - at various times in our journey we are met by a challenge approaching us with little warning. We know that there will inevitably be a ‘wide load following’.

When this happens:

• sometimes we have a bit of room to manoeuvre and the problem passes us by with little impact

• at other times we take a deep breath and slow right on down, concentrating on the absolute basics and dealing with the issue as best we can

• occasionally our pathway is restricted and all we can do is ride out the collision, doing what we can and hoping for the best

All of these are good and appropriate responses given the circumstances. Due to various situations at the moment I feel like I am in the middle stage and I know that some of my friends and clients are as well.

You all know the type of thing I am talking about:

• dealing with ill health (your own or a family member’s)
• supporting ageing parents
• coping with a reduced income
• trying to find employment
• worrying about all there is to do

I want to encourage you to take a deep breath and release some of the tension you might be carrying. You have everything you need to get through this, even though your choices may seem restricted at this stage. Doing the best you can is all that is required. You may not be able to see what is around the next corner, but your task is to concentrate on the basics for now. There will be plenty of time for your horizons to open up, so take courage and wait for the ‘wide load’ to pass.

One of the fundamental tasks that we tend to neglect is to look after ourselves when the burden seems heavy. But self-care is even more important at these times, so be kind to yourself. I always try to take encouragement from the small moments of joy and beauty that can be appreciated along the way. Stopping to listen to birdsong; looking up at the clouds floating by; breathing in the scent of the apple blossom; sharing a coffee with a friend; hugging someone you love – all take so little time but they feed our souls and leave us with a lighter heart.  

So next time life confronts you with a sign that there is a ‘wide load’ on its way, take a deep breath, slow down and attend to the smallest things that are important to keep you going. Gather your strength and remember that you are up to the challenge and eventually this too shall pass. 

About the author

Marian Kerr draws deeply on the experience of her own journey of self-discovery, and skills gained through self-employment, team leading, training, journalism and extensive community work to gently communicate her vision of self-acceptance and self-empowerment to clients of all ages. She shares her wisdom and intuition in a practical, down to earth way that focuses on possibilities and encourages personal transformation and growth that meets the individual's own goals and dreams. To read more from Marian go to http://www.mariankerr.co.nz/blog